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I need an out sometimes and so I created this blog.

Friday, December 31, 2010

New Years Eve

Well it is 10:17 and I am sitting here watching The Simpsons and blogging. I never thought I would be this person. I use to be such an asshole in so many ways and I think to myself if I wouldn't have gotten sick I would probably still be an asshole. Now I am a person that my little sister can look up to and be proud of. It's funny though when I am not feeling well she is like the little mother and she was told if she keeps her grades up she could be there for transplant day and she keeps telling me I am not going to miss it I am going to be there and I am not leaving. I am not happy that I got sick because I hate it more than anything but I do like the person I have become. Any how I have another one of my headaches from hell and it won't go away I have had it since this morning. I am sure the computer screen is not helping at all but I have not really been on in a while and I need to start writing at least once a day even if it is an update. My Dad and our pair are getting cross matched we should have the answer next week. Trina did some of her testing on Thursday and she gets more done on Monday. I keep trying not to get mine or her hopes up just because this is a lot of pressure and I know both Meghan and my Dad were both so devastated and it didn't help that I was a complete basket case and couldn't stop crying. I just don't want her to feel bad if she can't because just offering and being tested means a lot no matter what I have gained a great friend. I just really hope it works out and I can finally get a kidney I don't want to do this anymore I want to be able to walk Max, jog I just want a normal life again like when I was in 7th grade lol that is the last time I remember feeling good but over the years it is not like I helped myself I have gotten better but I know I can be better too. Well I am going to go get some water I am starting to have stomach pain. One day soon all of this will go away and I will feel GREAT!

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Donor in first successful U.S. organ transplant dies

Ronald Lee Herrick, who donated a kidney to his dying twin brother 56 years ago in what's recognized as the world's first successful organ transplant, has died of complications following heart surgery. He was 79.
Herrick died Monday at the Augusta Rehabilitation Center in Augusta, said his wife, Cynthia. He had been in deteriorating health since his October surgery, she said.
Herrick gave a kidney to his twin brother, Richard, at what is now Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston. The 5 1/2-hour operation on Dec. 23, 1954, kept Herrick's brother alive for eight years and was the first successful organ transplant, according to the United Network for Organ Sharing. Lead surgeon Dr. Joseph Murray went on to win a Nobel Prize.
The operation proved that transplants were possible and led to thousands of other successful kidney transplants and ultimately the transplant of other organs. Doctors had tried a handful of transplants worldwide without success up to that point, said Murray, who went on to perform another 18 transplants between identical twins.
"This operation rejuvenated the whole field of transplantation," Murray, 91, told The Associated Press in a phone interview from his home in Wellesley, Mass. "There were other people studying transplants in four or five different countries, but the fact that it worked so well with the identical twins was a tremendous stimulus."
Herrick was raised on a family farm in Rutland, Massachusetts, where he graduated high school. He later served in the U.S. Army.
At 23, Herrick was glad to give up a kidney if it would help his brother, who was dying from chronic nephritis, an inflammation of the kidneys. Murray thought the odds of a transplanted organ being accepted would be enhanced since they were identical twins.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010


OMG!!!!!!!!!!! Trina is a MATCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My Dad just passed his test which means he is good to go for PAIRED DONATION!!!!!!! It is all coming together! Thank you Trina and Thank you Dad! I don't know what I would do without this gift.

Monday, December 27, 2010


I was just on Ihatedialysis.com and I read something that a spouse/caregiver wrote and it hit me...

You don't even know how to cook with salt

You stare at their ankles discretely to see if they are underdialyzed

You worry about their fistula when they cut their hand

You jump out of bed when you hear beep beep

You pretend not to notice when they just have to have fries and a shake

You secretly wonder if they have taken their meds, and check the bottles when they are in the shower.

You can tell when they are faking not feeling well to get out of something, and you know when they are faking feeling well in order to do something - and you let them get away with both anyway.

You secretly study everything you can about their disease, but you act dumb when they explain something to you.

You lay awake at night terrified about how alone you will feel if something happened to them, and you cry.

I just thought this was a very sweet a dedicated women,

Wednesday, December 15, 2010


Well it is a Christmas Miracle! Santa must be real because my Christmas gift has been coming true times 3! My dad has been flying through with colors for the paired donation and Trina gets her blood drawn on Tuesday AND her mom said if something falls through with her then she is up next she is O negative. This is the most amazing gift a person can give you and to give it to someone you have never met but knows that they can give you one of there spare parts just so you can have your life back....it is so hard for me to put in words. Today when I called Trina I had so much I wanted to say but I could not find the words and then I started crying and was just holding it in because I didn't want to be a basket case the first time we spoke. I just want all three of them to know that this means more to me then I can even explain. This is the best Christmas of my life and the most meaningful and now I can honestly say I know what the true meaning of giving is this year. Thank you so much for all of your support. I know we have all been waiting for this. Tonight when I called my mom and dad and told them about Trina's mom my mom was so happy she was so overwhelmed with joy she started crying and telling me this is all they wanted for Christmas. I love her so much and I felt what she was feeling right there in that moment. Thank you...

Sunday, December 12, 2010


Well Saturday my mom called me and told me she wanted to take me out to lunch but didn't say where. Steven drove us to Macyo's I turned the corner and there was my entire family including my DAD!!!! I bursted into tears and ran to him. I was not expecting that in a million years. That was the best birthday present I could have ever asked for. I wish my step-mom could have been there but I know it is hard for both of them to leave because of the puppies. Even Char was there the little shit knew about it and didn't spill the beans her and I were both shocked...HAHAHA. Char even planned on us going to the game today which is fun but SO LOUD. My dad is also finishing his testing tomorrow so that right there is the best gift. It was really great to see my dad I miss him so much. OH and my sissy made the BEST cupcakes EVER! VANILLA BEAN!!!! It was great thought Aunt Debbie, Grandma and Grandpa Shelley, Grandpa Flynn, Lins,Shorty,Tommy,Nancy,Laura,Grady,Mikey,Char, and Sassy. This really was a great surprise and I will remember it forever. Well I am going to go to bed because my head is killing me from the game but here are some pictures. I will be back tomorrow with the news from my dad.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Saturday Night

Well it has been a long week! I was trying to re coupe from a extremely busy holiday. Meghan and Merrick came down for Thanksgiving which was great we played Cranium which was a blast. I didn't eat very much on Thanksgiving I was not feeling all that great. To be honest this whole week was a little rough but come to find out I was not feeling good because I was holding in fluid and that just made me feel like complete shit but it is going away with the 2.5 bags. My sissy Lins and I went shopping on Thursday which was so nice I missed her so much and am so excited that she moved back. Today we went to see Burlesque IT WAS WONDERFUL! Christina and Cher were fabulous! Since I had such a busy couple weeks tonight I am just resting, such a fun Saturday night. Maybe I will watch a movie and then go to bed I am pretty tired. Still have not heard anything new about the person who could possibly be a match, my dad's contract is almost finished so he will be down here soon to finish his testing. Derek and Treena are still 100% on board to still get testing done if something doesn't work out. I just think it is so amazing how people who have never met you are ready and willing to give you a part of them.